Don’t arrest him. You need to be vewwy, vewwy, quiet … he’s hunting punk-ass teenagers.
A 15-year-old boy was struck above his right knee with a single gunshot fired by Charles Joseph Arminger, according to Lt. Steven Jones of the Calvert County Sheriff’s Office.
Apparently Charles Joseph Arminger is a bad shot. When you hunt, you shoot to kill, man.
Elitist reporter note: Does anyone else find the repetition of “Calvert County Sherriff’s Office” in the two introductory paragraphs (which are only a sentence long apiece) a bit irritating? It could have been avoided in order to flow better. But who wants flow when you want to give the Calvert County Sherriff’s Office in Solomons, Md. a shout-out or two?
"A civilian took matters into his own hands and a tragedy occurred," said Lt. Jones.
Well, yes, and if it weren’t for those damn skateboards, he would have gotten away with it too! I mean, do you know how hard it is to shoot to kill a moving target?
Grammar Nazi note: I had to look up the meaning of the word “tragedy” because I found it a little strong given what happened. One of the definitions is “a shocking or sad event; disaster,” so I guess it could apply. But I think Lt. Jones of the Calvert County Sherriff’s Office needs a lesson in connotation/denotation. Just saying.
Arminger told Sheriff's Office investigators that he had encountered problems in the past with a group of juvenile skateboarders at the Solomons Landing Condominiums' property.
What kind of problems? Just because you don’t like them there does not mean they are necessarily a problem. We need more information here. Is the Solomons Landing Condominium community an old-folks condo community? If so, then yes, the teenagers being there could be a problem. If they live there too, then, hey, old man, they gotta have a place to skateboard. You need targets for shooting practice. It’s actually a win-win, as opposed to a nuisance.
Grammar Nazi note: Does Sherriff’s Office need to be capitalized here? I don’t think so. It’s just a general statement, so I would think “sheriff’s office investigators” would work just fine. Then again, perhaps the author intended to write “Calvert County Sherriff’s Office investigators,” in which yes, the capitalization would be necessary. Represent!
He told police that he saw seven or eight teens on their skateboards using profanity and attempted to intervene. He said one of the teens called him a profane name, so he pepper-sprayed them.
What does profanity have to do with the skateboard? Does the skateboard make them profane? Wow, I didn’t know that.
What did he do to the kid to warrant being called a profane name? Perhaps it was justified. I mean, I’ve encountered people who completely and utterly deserved the term “asshole” I threw in their direction. (In fact, my dad even had it painted under the handle on the driver’s side door of his old El Camino.)
Arminger went back to his home and retrieved his shotgun. He said he intended to fire the shot to scare the juveniles, but struck the 15-year-old.
So, pepper spray didn’t work – I’m sure you got called all kinds of fun names after that incident, so of course the next logical step is to get your gun. After all, you can’t hunt with pepper spray!
He intended to fire the shot to scare them, but hit one instead. Uhh, there are so many ways to do that without hitting someone. He aimed the gun in their general direction and pulled the trigger. He intended to do it whether he said he did or not.
I think the real crime here is that he didn’t have a permit to hunt punk-ass teenagers on skateboards.
And – just for fun, found this from a follow-up story:
Scott Burroughs Sr. said his son Scotty is in the hospital with a titanium rod that extends from his hip to his knee.
"I could have lost my 15-year-old son because he was skateboarding," Burroughs said.
Overdramatic, much? I mean, unless you put him in a bubble, you could lose him letting him do just about anything. He could do something stupid on his skateboard and break his neck. He could get hit by a car walking across the parking lot to call the old man names. He could be involved in a bus crash on the way to school. He could be the victim of a school shooting. He could contract a flesh-eating virus. I mean, honestly, what an idiotic thing to say.
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