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| According to the original site, the bulletproof vest in this pic holds 392 Snickers. |
Peruvian prisons ain’t Alcatraz.
Yes, well, does that surprise you?
Joran van der Sloot, the principal suspect in the disappearance of Alabama teen Natalee Holloway in Aruba, is rumored to have gotten his latest girlfriend pregnant while imprisoned in Lima.
Aww, he’s going to be a daddy, how sweet. I’d say I hope he lives long enough to see his daughter go to Aruba on a school trip to be abducted and killed (come on, you know Holloway is dead) but I hope Peru disposes of him long before then. Besides, it’s wrong to wish that on anyone … let me rephrase, it’s okay to wish it on him cause he’s scum, but not to the idiot he knocked up or the kid’s future friends/family.
The Dutchman is currently incarcerated at Castro Castro Jail while awaiting a murder trial for the death and robbery of Stephany Flores in June 2010.
Is it just me, or when you see the word “Dutchman” you immediately think of Davy Jones? (Of Pirates of the Caribbean, not The Monkees.)
When is that trial going to happen? It’s only been a year since he killed her? Seems like it’s been longer.
His new girlfriend, who is not identified, allegedly worked at a casino frequented by Stephany Flores and visits van der Sloot’s cell to do “chores” and give him candy, which he uses to run a “lucrative” snack bar from his cell.
Alright, does anyone really question this woman’s sanity at this point? Who is that hard up for sex that they fall for van der Sloot’s lines, even after we all know what he’s done (and I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if there are more bodies of girls hidden all over Aruba or Peru at his hands)? And really, she does chores? What kind of chores is she performing if it has to be in quotes? Are BJs considered chores now?
She brings him candy, and he runs a “lucrative” snack bar from his cell. So, he’s like Red, only he deals in Snickers instead of 50s Hollywood stars in bathing suits? Would you trust anything that passed from this man’s hands to yours? God knows I wouldn’t.
The victim’s father, Ricardo Flores, saw van der Sloot at a recent court hearing and said he expected to see a “miserable person.” Instead, he was shocked to see a ”fatso.”
Elitist reporter note: There are two victims mentioned in this story, I believe this could have been/should have been written more clearly.
No, see, here’s the thing victim daddy, you “wanted” to see a “miserable person.”
Based on the caption of the photo, was he fat, or just stashing snacks on his person?
Ricardo Flores has asked jail officials to investigate the conjugal visits.
The only conjugal visit this jerk-off should get is with his left hand.
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