Snow

I wrote this short story a few years ago, and I've been very particular with whom I've shared it. However, my brother's been on my mind a lot lately - to the point I had freaky dreams last night - so I felt it necessary to post this today. You're not going to laugh today, in fact, you may cry. Just be prepared.

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Todd ran inside and grabbed the cup of hot chocolate his mom held out for him, and wrapped his hands around the mug before he took his first, hot, chocolaty gulp.

“I can’t believe he can play in the snow like this, it’s f-f-f-reezing out there,” Todd said.

Todd’s mom smiled. “You like pools and sunshine, he likes cold and snow. Everyone likes different things.”

Michael, Todd’s best friend finally came inside. Todd’s mom held out a steaming cup of hot chocolate for him and Michael took it with a smile.

“This snow is awesome. I haven’t seen snow like this in a long time. I’m so glad they cancelled school so we can play in it,” Michael said.

“Hmprh,” Todd grunted through a big mouthful of chocolate and marshmallow.

Michael polished off his hot chocolate and said, “Alright, time to go back outside!”

Todd swirled the rest of his hot chocolate (now just a tad bit cold) around to stall as Michael put his coat back on. Todd slowly put his coat, gloves, and boots back on and the two headed back outside. Todd’s mom just watched the two out the window as they made snow angels, had snowball fights, and played with the family’s dog in the snow. (There were no snowmen, Todd hated snowmen, and Michael, being Todd’s best friend never pushed the issue. He built snowmen when Todd wasn’t around.)

Much to Michael’s dismay, the snow melted. Months passed, seasons changed, and school let out. It was summertime again. That meant sleeping in, pool parties, and saving up for visits by the ice cream man.

Todd’s parents finally opened up the pool and Todd was so excited. If he could, he’d live in the pool. He invited Michael over every day to swim with him.

“Let’s play Marco Polo,” screamed Todd from across the pool.

“Alright,” Michael said.

Todd closed his eyes. “Marco.”

“Polo.”

“Marco.”

“Polo.”

“Got ya,” Todd said as he tagged Michael. “Now let’s throw the rings and dive for them!” Todd climbed out of the pool and grabbed the diving rings.

“I’m not feeling so good, I’m going to go home,” said Michael.

“Alright,” said Todd. “I’ll see you out here tomorrow.” Little did Todd and Michael know that was the last time Michael was going to come over to swim with Todd that summer. Todd asked about Michael a lot, but Todd’s mom just shook her head, claiming she didn’t know anything.

Eventually summer faded away and it was time for school to start again. As always, Todd and Michael were in the same class. Todd stopped by to get Michael on his way to school. Michael wasn’t looking too well, but he grabbed his bookbag and he and Todd were off on their way to school, just like the last two years when they met the day before kindergarten started while picking out bookbags in the store.

But things didn’t seem right with Michael. He was thinner, paler, he didn’t have the excitement for things like he used to have. He took things at a slower pace, and his parents seemed to hover over him a lot, at least that’s what Todd seemed to see. Michael shooed them away like flies, but it never stopped them.

Then one day, late in October, Todd stopped by Michael’s house on the way to school and Michael’s mother told him that Michael wouldn’t be going to school that day. But Todd could come by later if he wanted to bring Michael back his homework.

After school that day, knowing Michael wouldn’t like the fact he brought him his homework, Todd knocked on the door. There was no answer. Todd was confused. But Michael’s mother told him to come back, didn’t she? He walked around the edge of the garage and peeked in the door, Michael’s mom’s car was gone. Hmm, where did they go? If he stayed home sick, she wouldn’t have gone anywhere, she would have stayed home to get him chicken noodle soup or something, that’s just the way she was.

Todd gave up and headed home. Todd’s mom met him at the door and asked him if he went to Michael’s house. “Well, yeah, b-b-but that’s b-b-because his m-m-mom told me t-t-to,” he stammered.

“Oh, honey,” his mother said, wrapping her arms around him. “You’re not in trouble. I was just worried. But we do need to talk.”

Todd sat down at the table and grabbed one of the chocolate chip cookies his mom offered to him. Something was wrong, and it was big. He thought about the possibilities. Were she and dad getting a divorce? Were they moving? Is grandma moving in with them and taking his room?

“Honey, Michael wasn’t home when you stopped by because he went to the hospital,” his mom started. “He’s a very sick little boy.”

“Sick how?”

“Well, you may have noticed that you haven’t been playing with him that much since this summer. And since school started he lost weight and hasn’t looked the same.” She paused, took a breath, and then continued, “He’s got cancer. Unfortunately he wasn’t diagnosed until it was very advanced, and they immediately started treatment. He was doing much better until today.”

Todd stopped chewing and dropped the rest of his cookie on the floor. Before he could pick it up, their dog walked up and ate the rest of it. Todd was too dumbfounded to notice.

“But, what does this mean? What’s going to happen?” Todd’s mom reached across the table and put her hand on his arm.

“Well, honey, I don’t know. He could get better, he may not. It really all depends on how good the medicine and what God has in plan for Michael.”

Todd just nodded.

“Once Michael is better, his mother is going to call me, and you can go see him, if you want to.”

Todd just nodded once again, and then ran to his room.

Todd didn’t understand. Why would something as big as cancer happen to his best friend? And what if he didn’t get better? What would he do? He couldn’t replace his best friend. That’s just wrong, he thought. How would he handle the rest of second grade without Michael next to him? Who would pick him for his dodgeball team knowing he really wasn’t that good? Todd shook his head, he wasn’t going to think about that because it didn’t matter because Michael was going to get better and that was that. He knew it. He just had to be positive.

So Todd got down on his knees next to his bed, folded his hands, and prayed. “Dear God, please watch over my friend Michael and make him better. He’s a good kid, and deserves to go on to the third grade and learn long division. Please make him better, and please let him see another snowfall because he loves snow so much. Amen.” Todd got up, washed his hands, and went to eat dinner with his parents.

Michael spent two weeks in the hospital. After a week, Todd was allowed to go see him. Even though Michael was weak, the two boys would play checkers and cards, and laugh and joke around. The two boys never talked about Michael being sick. Todd’s mom asked him one night why they never talked about it and Todd just shrugged and said, “It’s not important when you’re trying to win at checkers.”

Todd begged his mom to do something special for Michael the day he came home from the hospital. Michael was going to come home in the afternoon on Saturday so Todd and his mom worked in the kitchen all day and made dinner and dessert to surprise Michael’s family so they didn’t have to cook. Todd was so proud of himself, because he made the cupcakes all by himself.

When they saw Michael’s family’s car pull in, Todd and his parents headed over to Michael’s house with the food. Michael’s entire family was very grateful and they all sat down and had a very nice meal together. After dinner the two boys went off and played video games, because that’s the one thing Michael said he missed most while he was in the hospital.

Michael didn’t go to school with the regular kids, he got a special teacher at home so Todd didn’t have to bring him his homework after school every day. But Todd would stop by every afternoon to say hi or play a game just so Michael didn’t feel left out. Some days Michael would be asleep and Todd would go home, some days Michael and Todd would play for hours and you wouldn’t know he was sick at all.

One day Todd went home, grabbed a handful of chips and got ready to head over to Michael’s house. Todd’s mom stopped him. She cleared her throat. “Umm, honey, are you going to Michael’s house?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Michael’s not there.”

“Does he have a doctor’s appointment again? Sheesh, he could have told me.”

“No, it’s not a doctor’s appointment. Honey, sit down.” Todd sat down and ate a chip. Todd’s mom took the rest of the chips out of his hand and placed her hands on his shoulders. “Honey, Michael passed away.”

“Passed away? Like died? Like not coming back? Are you serious?”

“Yes. He never woke up this morning. He’s playing video games with God now.”

Todd gave a half-smile. “I wonder if God lets him win like I did.”

“Are you okay with all of this?”

Todd straightened up. “Do I have a choice? Is it like if I say no God’s going to let him come back?” He ran to his room and slammed the door. His mom walked to his room after him and heard sobbing. She tapped at the door, but he shouted “Go away.”

In the three days since he heard the news, first he held out hope his mom was going to come in and tell him it was all a joke. This really didn’t happen, it was a dream. He was going to wake up and Michael was going to be alive and well and they were going to walk to school in the morning like they always did.

Then he had been angry. He was angry at Michael for getting sick and leaving him. He was angry with God for letting it happen. He was angry with Michael’s parents for not protecting him from getting sick. He was angry with Michael’s doctors for not treating him better. But then he realized that wasn’t right, he couldn’t be angry with any of those people, everyone had just been doing their best to make Michael better. Even him.

Then he thought maybe it was his fault and he was being punished for not being a better friend. He thought maybe he wasn’t such a good friend because he played video games too much, so offered God a deal – his video games for Michael back. When he said his prayers at night, he even promised that he wouldn’t make Michael play in the pool so much in the summertime, and maybe, just maybe, he’d let Michael build a snowman or two – if only he’d come back.

But then Todd got scared. Maybe he was next. If Michael could get real sick so easily, maybe he could too. After all, he and Michael spent a lot of time together, maybe he caught the cancer too. When he got that fear, he crept out of his room, climbed up into his mom’s lap, laid his head on her chest and asked quietly, “Mommy, will I catch the cancer like Michael did?”

“No, honey. You can’t catch cancer from spending time with Michael. You will be just fine. You have nothing to worry about.”

Todd wrapped his mom’s hair around his little finger, still not completely convinced, but he relaxed a little and fell asleep in her arms. When he woke up the next morning, he was in his bed, and it was he day of Michael’s funeral.

Todd was scared of Michael’s funeral. He was scared because he had never been to a funeral before, he didn’t know what to expect. But he was also scared because their entire second-grade class was singing ‘Amazing Grace’ and he didn’t want to mess it up. He wanted to sing it perfect, because he was singing for Michael.

The church was completely full, Todd had no idea so many people had been touched by Michael in his seven short years on this planet. It was so weird to see the small coffin in the front of the room, knowing his best friend was in there, but that they were never going to see each other again. That even though they were in the same room, they couldn’t talk, they couldn’t make faces at each other, they couldn’t even communicate in their secret sign language.

Todd shook those thoughts out of his head. He couldn’t think about any of that now. All 21 students lined up at the front of the church and started to sing. Todd looked at his feet, even though the choir director, Mrs. Pickett, told them to look into the audience.

When he made it to the line “When we’ve been there 10,000 years, bright shining as the sun” Todd finally looked up from his feet and out the window. Where the sun had been shining when they entered the church, it was now dull outside – and snowing. A big smile crossed Todd’s face as he completed the song.

Michael’s parents came over for dinner after the funeral and during dinner Michael’s dad asked why Todd began to smile so big in the middle of the song. “Well, I looked up and I noticed the snow. It was the first snow of the season.”

“Yes,” replied Michael’s father. He looked at the other three adults at the table and shrugged his shoulders.

“Well, you see, Michael loved snow, remember? And we were there for Michael. Don’t you think Michael was there, listening to all the things we were saying about him? I know I would be. So when I saw the snow, I just knew it was Michael’s way of telling us he had showed up.”

Michael’s mother put her hand to her throat and choked back a tear, but Michael’s father just chuckled. “You’ve got a point, he definitely wouldn’t have missed it.”

“That’s an interesting thought son,” Todd’s father said.

“It’s not a thought Dad, it’s the truth. I just know it.”

The snow kept up for days, and continued to pile up. Michael and Todd’s parents spent a lot of time together, because Michael’s parents said they just didn’t seem to enjoy the empty house and Todd’s parents said they were welcome to come over any time.

School had been cancelled and Todd woke up late. Michael’s parents were sitting at the table drinking coffee with his parents with a box of doughnuts in the middle of the table.

“Would you like a doughnut?” asked Michael’s dad as Todd walked by.

Todd ignored them. He had better things on his mind. He had a plan. He skipped the doughnut, grabbed his jacket, gloves, and boots and headed outside. The four adults sort of breathed a sigh of relief, it was nice to see Todd begin to resume normal life and start playing outside again instead of hiding in his room since Michael passed away.

Forty-five minutes later, Todd came running inside and made two mugs of hot chocolate and ran back outside. Todd’s mom noticed he had a second mug and glanced out the window to see what he was doing.

When she looked outside, there was Todd, putting the finishing touches on a snowman, wrapping a scarf around his neck, and placing a steaming mug of hot chocolate in front of it. Still struggling to put on their coats, the four adults ran outside and Todd’s mom asked, “Honey, what are you doing? You hate snowmen.”

A small grin snuck across his face.

“This isn’t a snowman, it’s a snow-Michael.”